Cohen

older children define play as whatever you do with your friends. However, toddlers and preschoolers define play as doing whatever you choose.5 This self-determination is

When we constantly tell children what they should or shouldn't do, they have no room to think for themselves and are forced to choose between resentful obedience or defiant rebellion. Playfulness helps them think for themselves, even about serious topics.

The best example of Sullivan's side-by-side seating arrangement is the way that nontalkative boys are known for doing their best talking in the car, staring straight ahead, while their mom or dad watches the road and listens.