Daniel Siegel

But change never just happens. It’s something we have to work at

Especially when we feel like a large percentage of our days are spent in full-blown survival mode, where we find ourselves wild-eyed and red-faced at the end of a birthday party, shouting, “If there’s one more argument over that bow and arrow, nobody’s getting any presents!”

moments you are just trying to survive are actually opportunities to help your child thrive.

you need to understand some basics about the young brain that you are helping to grow and develop.

How our kids make sense of their young lives is not only about what happens to them but also about how their parents, teachers, and other caregivers respond.

left side of the brain that helps you think logically and organize thoughts into sentences, and a right side that helps you experience emotions and read nonverbal cues. You also have a “reptile brain” that allows you to act instinctually and make split-second survival decisions, and a “mammal brain” that leads you toward connection and relationships.

That’s what integration does: it coordinates and balances the separate regions of the brain that it links together.

a person’s brain isn’t considered fully developed until she reaches her mid-twenties.

Likewise, when she is in a state of integration, she demonstrates the qualities we associate with someone who is mentally and emotionally healthy: she is flexible, adaptive, stable, and able to understand herself and the world around her.

when she is in a state of integration, she demonstrates the qualities we associate with someone who is mentally and emotionally healthy: she is flexible, adaptive, stable, and able to understand herself and the world around her.