Boosting Self-Esteem For Dummies

1. Consider the broad categories of: family and relationships; work, career and study; recreation and hobbies; religion and spirituality; community and culture; mental and physical well-being; and your personal living environment. Record what’s most important to you about those broad areas of your life.

With regard to family for example, it may be most important to you to spend plenty of time with your partner and children. Or perhaps you place emphasis on the importance of keeping in touch with relatives overseas. Your value statements are entirely up to you and your personal circumstances.

2. Identify one or more actions that you can take to demonstrate your value in each category.

Start with small realistic actions like setting up a standing order for a valued cause, getting home from work earlier to eat with the family or joining a community-based initiative.

3. Keep your values evaluation sheet handy and refer to it as a way of reminding yourself to stick with value-directed behaviour.

Unless you urge yourself to try out activities that you generally avoid, your self-esteem will remain low. Doing things even though you fear them builds confidence and a sense of capability. You also discover that you can survive incidents of failure or rejection without any permanent damage. You may feel upset for a time but you’ll recover.

The effects of low self-esteem are so insidious and all-pervasive that you may not even be truly aware of how much your negative self-view dictates your actions.