The Code of the Woosters

Well, be that as it may,

Winged creatures of the night barged into me, but I gave them little attention.

was not prepared to go quite so far as this in my attitude towards an, on the whole, excellent body of men.
‘Well, not en masse, if you understand the expression. I suppose they vary, like other sections of the community, some being full of

Yes, sir.’ I shook my head. Waste of time really, of course, because he couldn’t see me.

It was not so very long since she had been speaking in high terms of blackmail and giving it her hearty approval, but if you want to derive real satisfaction from blackmail, you have to be at the right end of it.

‘And switching to another aspect of the affair, you haven’t any immediate plans for getting me out of this, I suppose?’

‘Not adequately formulated, sir. I am turning over an idea in my mind.’

‘Turn well, Jeeves. Spare no effort.’

I don’t think I have ever assisted at a ceremony which gave such universal pleasure to all concerned. The sheet didn’t split, which pleased Gussie. Nobody came to interrupt us, which pleased me. And when I dropped the suitcase, it hit Gussie on the head, which delighted Aunt Dahlia.

Spink-Bottle, you ghastly goggle-eyed piece of gorgonzola, will you hop it or will you not?’

‘Bertie,’ said Aunt Dahlia, ‘I am only a weak woman, but if you won’t tread on this insect and throw the remains outside, I shall have to see what I can do.

Since then, though few men have been more sorely tried by the sex, I have never raised a hand against a woman. And I can give no better indication of my emotions at this moment than by saying that, preux chekialier though I am, I came within the veriest toucher of hauling off and letting a revered aunt have it on the side of the head with a papier mache elephant — the only object on the mantelpiece which the fierce rush of life at Totleigh Towers had left still unbroken.