Men Who Hate Women

Both worldviews rest heavily on the perception of women being without humanity, individuality or soul.

We are talking about an industry that exploits men’s worst fears, preys on their vulnerabilities and literally trains them in harassment, stalking and even sexual assault.

I am not particularly interested in a ‘redemption’ narrative for incels. That is a question for those individuals to ponder. We do not implore the victims of other forms of terrorism to absolve and educate their tormentors. Nor do we require that other extremists be acknowledged as some kind of wounded, misunderstood victims

When a red flag crops up, challenge it. Challenge it again and again. The manosphere is an echo chamber. The very reason it is so persuasive is that the nature of its closed communities and algorithmically supported video loops totally indoctrinates. No opposing views are shared. So share them. Expose young people to other ideas, other options. Challenge and question manosphere assumptions.

We are too afraid of being labelled ‘misandrists’ or ‘man-haters’, of encountering the traditional cry of ‘not all men’.

We are letting down our boys if we don’t acknowledge the deeply damaging and deliberately manipulative messaging they are being targeted with online. We fail them if we don’t give them an opportunity to have open, robust discussions about these issues in a safe forum in which they feel supported and able to express their fears and anxieties. We are leaving them dangling, with no meaningful conversations or factually accurate information at all in the majority of cases, leaving them deeply vulnerable to the circling online sharks. And, of course, the widespread fear-mongering described in the previous chapter drives them straight into the waiting, open arms of internet extremists.

The more we underestimate the manosphere, the more we risk serving it our young men on a platter.

Imagine having to try to confront those views among your classmates. Imagine going to school and learning alongside boys who genuinely believe they are simply genetically superior to you.

if young people are confronted with material online that minimises or even glorifies sexual violence, it has a major offline impact on how they respond to it in the real world, too.

He seemed nervous but excited, confident he had caught me in a lie, with the air of triumphantly unmasking me in front of all his fellow students.

But not being a ‘misogynist’ doesn’t mean that you can’t sometimes behave in sexist ways.