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Susan Cain

Quiet Power

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    Hans Eysenck, also believed that we have ideal levels of stimulation. So, extroverts might seek out noise and crowds, but introverts look for peace and privacy. We don’t do this simply to relax. It also helps us think clearly.
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    But if pulled too far, we can snap. The trick is to know our own limits.
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    Yet we can stretch ourselves. The sensitive and cautious can learn to act boldly; the impulsive and outspoken can learn to delay gratification and be diplomatic.
    I like to think of this as the rubber band theory of personality.
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    Dr. Carl Schwartz of Harvard Medical School. He explained that our personalities are, to some extent, hardwired into our brains and nervous systems from birth. As we talked about earlier, we are born with temperaments—the tendency to act and feel in specific ways—and we cannot switch our temperaments at will.
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    Introverts like us are sometimes so deep in our heads
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    She has decided that she doesn’t need to regret having missed something if she was perfectly happy doing what she chose to do instead.
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    If you only get to know people through their social media presence, you might not see that they feel just as fragile as you do—including the extroverted ones!
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    “I don’t want people to see me in a way that’s not really me, and I don’t want to see people in a way that’s not really them.”
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    The most sustainable solution is to get better and better at being who you already are, and to learn what situations make you the most comfortable and how to find comfort in situations that aren’t ideal.
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    Your job is to find out what makes this person interesting. Remember too that even the smoothest or most intimidating people carry their own inner pain.
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